Thursday, April 5, 2012

Let Us Pause To Marvel At The Uncanny Genius That Was The Ramones In 1976-77

It's Alive is a remarkable live album; it plays like a greatest hits collection, or, since the Ramones never had a hit, perhaps it's better to say a "best of." There are 28 songs culled from the first three Ramones albums. There is no filler, there are no weird outtakes or interesting experiments, and nothing is included to showcase one or more of the musicians--every minute of the album is a full-bore frontal assault on the hypothalamus. There are no low points. It's a remarkable achievement for a band with only three studio albums--every song is taken from the albums, every one could have been a single, the songs are not embellished yet there is never a moment when one is tempted to think "do I need a live version of this?" As if that's not enough, however, take a look at the remaining songs from the first three Ramones albums, the ones not included on It's Alive:

Beat on the Brat
I Wanna Be Your Boyfriend
I Don't Wanna Go Down To The Basement
Loudmouth
53rd and 3rd
I Remember You
Carbona Not Glue
Swallow My Pride
What's Your Game
You Should Never Have Opened That Door
Locket Love
I Can't Give You Anything
Ramona 
Why Is It Always This Way?

This could be an exceptional "best of" collection. In fact, every song from the first three Ramones albums could be a "best of" selection. How many bands in rock history could have a "best of" collection taken from their first three albums as good as the above list of songs not on It's Alive? Probably none; maybe not even The Beatles, and if we add the other 28 songs, definitely not the Beatles! That's a powerful argument for why the Ramones are on a very short list of the absolute greatest rock bands of all time. 

The Beatles' genius was more diverse than that of the Ramones; they were more innovative and adaptable after the initial phase of their career. The Ramones' palette was much more limited than a lot of bands, probably than most other bands. But that was a good bit of the point of the Ramones; every song was a manifesto for simplicity and sticking with what works and jettisoning the rest (although the claim repeated ad nauseum that the Ramones were a three-chord band is simply false). And, if anything, that makes the Ramones' achievement even more impressive: they managed to write the greatest 2-minute pop song anyone had ever heard over and over and over, filling whole albums with them (This wouldn't be an easy claim to make about the albums that followed, but "I Wanna Be Sedated," "She's The One," "Do You Remember Rock n Roll Radio?," "Rock n Roll High School," "The KKK Took My Baby Away" and "Psychotherapy" didn't even exist yet when It's Alive was recorded).

Considering that It's Alive was recorded at the end of 1977, and the first Ramones album was released in early 1976, it's positively staggering to consider what the Ramones achieved in less than two years. I doubt any other band, ever, could claim to have produced as many great songs in a comparable period of time (even subtracting the four cover songs, that's still 38 classic original songs). If anyone wishes to contest this claim in the comments below, I'm all ears.


Wednesday, April 4, 2012

Brain Drain again

This is one of two Ramones studio albums I never previously owned or was at least extensively familiar with. The few times I heard it in the 80s I was not impressed. For one thing, I was turned off by the notion that the Ramones did a song called "Pet Sematary" and didn't really give it a chance. I was always turned off by Stephen King as a youth, probably because all my classmates read him while my typically anguished and alienated teenage existence was spent reading things like Joyce, Faulkner and Yeats (if that sounds snobby and pretentious so be it).

But now I like "Pet Sematary," mostly because of Joey's singing. It's definitely lightweight and corny, but for some reason these qualities seem less threatening when considering a 20 year old album than when deciding if "the new Ramones" is worth buying. I do not skip this song.

I love love love "I Believe in Miracles," out of proportion, I am sure, to its actual merits. Again this is mostly due to Joey, I think. The guitars on this album, by the way, are not recorded in a very satisfying way. Anyway this song is the greatest, even if it isn't. Lyrically it's like one of those embarrassing celebrity memoirs where the protagonist exults over their salvation from drugs, only to publicly fall from grace again..."I used to be on an endless run/Believe in miracles 'cause I'm one" writes Dee Dee, 12 years before dying from a heroin overdose. But Joey sings it, not Dee Dee, so it is easy to downplay the autobiographical aspect of it...

Zero Zero UFO is perplexing, not bad but not great, I generally don't skip it. "Don't Bust My Chops" isn't terrible but I often skip it. Unlike "I Believe in Miracles," it's probably better than the enjoyment I get out of it (almost none) would indicate.

"Punishment Fits the Crime" is a fascinating artifact. It is sung by Dee Dee but is nothing like any of his other efforts. It might be one of the worst songs ever recorded, I'm not really sure, but it's still kind of engaging and I don't always skip it. I don't know what it means, and the closest genre I can ascribe to it is probably glam metal...Here's the chorus: "Let the punishment fit the crime/The footprint on the sand of time/The philosophy of the poet's rhyme/Make a man humble in his prime." Laughably bad stuff but I almost enjoy it sometimes.

"All Screwed Up" almost hits the target but not quite. I do not generally skip it. There's a kernel here worth keeping but I am not convinced they pull it off. "Palisades Park" is a good idea but for some reason the cover doesn't work, I don't know if it's too fast or what exactly happened. After that is "Pet Sematary," already reviewed above. "Learn To Listen" I skip, there's nothing very enjoyable there, it's kind of a hardcore mess.

"Can't Get You Outta My Mind" is brilliant, maybe even a classic, I like it more and more and I'm no longer convinced the Pleasant Dreams outtake version is better, this one is probably a bit heavier and the Mama's and Papa's harmonies on the first being pared down a bit may not be a bad thing.

"Ignorance is Bliss" is so-so but I don't always skip it. "Come Back Baby" and "Merry Christmas" are both very nice Joey numbers, never to be skipped.

So: five really good ones. I am going to upgrade the stars on this below, because this is a much more engaging album than I thought.

Friday, March 30, 2012

Stars

These are all potentially subject to revision (except the first four) but here's an attempt at rating all the Ramones studio albums, five stars maximum:

Ramones *****
Leave Home*****
Rocket to Russia *****
Road to Ruin *****
End of the Century ****
Pleasant Dreams ****
Subterranean Jungle ***1/2
Too Tough to Die ***
Animal Boy **1/2
Halfway to Sanity **1/2
Brain Drain **1/2
Mondo Bizarro ***1/2
Adios Amigos*1/2

Brain Drain, Adios Amigos, Halfway to Sanity

Brain Drain is not quite as bad as I remembered. The guitar could be mixed higher. This is a weird album, there's plenty of stuff that is kind of amusing but very little that is really very good. After I listen more I'll perhaps review it. "Can't Get You Outta My Mind" is a great song but I'm still fairly convinced the Pleasant Dreams outtake is better.

Adios Amigos still sounds awful to me, a lot of pop punk that sounds like it's almost good enough to be TV commercials.

Halfway to Sanity is way better than I remembered. I hadn't heard it since the 80s, when I liked it for a while then cooled on it. A song I forgot existed--"A Real Cool Time"--is pretty good. "Weasel Face" is not that bad. "I Wanna Live" is better than I'd remembered. I'm still puzzling over what I think of "Garden of Serenity," it's definitely not that bad, but is it good? I could be convinced either way. The problem, as with so many late songs, is the lyrics--do they say anything to me? Finally, "Bye Bye Baby" is back in my good graces, it's kind of like an early-60s girl song, especially with the drum beat.

Tuesday, March 27, 2012

"A Modest Proposal": A Modest Proposal

To my list of phrases which should be discontinued immediately ("...And its Discontents"), I would like to add "A Modest Proposal." As usual, if you have to ask why you'll never know.

Sunday, March 25, 2012

Someone Wasn't Paying Attention

It's started again already:

http://opinionator.blogs.nytimes.com/2012/03/25/character-and-its-discontents/

Thursday, March 22, 2012

Ten Underrated Ramones Songs

Or at least ones I don't hear about much, and are, as far as I know, uncompiled. I take it as obvious that nothing from the first 5 albums qualifies.

In The Park
I Won't Let It Happen
Mental Hell
She Belongs to Me
Death of Me
Don't Go
She's A Sensation
What'd You Do?
Can't Get You Outta My Mind
Stares In This Town